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How do you build trust with someone who is uncooperative?

This is a challenging and increasingly serious issue on which a number of clients have recently consulted us.

How can you unblock the mind-set of an uncooperative colleague?

If you are, for example, a newly appointed director, you will most likely be looking at every aspect of your firm and challenging the way things are done:

Why do we work in this outmoded fashion?
Why do we continue to do this unprofitable work?
Why do we continue to accept low standards and levels of performance?
What are we going to do about it?

A new director can easily misread the current attitude and knowledge base of the organisation and push for change at such a rate that fosters resentment and opposition. You may try to introduce ideas that could really make a difference to the efficiency and profitability of your organisation, but you hit a solid wall of resistance. In particular, one pivotal colleague is not happy with the tone or pace of change that you are proposing. Your plan, to you and your team, seems totally logical and relatively risk-free, but this particular colleague just doesn't seem to 'get it'. You have hit a seemingly impenetrable obstacle? But is it? How can you go about unblocking the mind of your colleague? The method that we have found most successful is to tackle the problem head on by building TRUST with the dissociated individual. How should this be approached?

Choose your words with precision.
Act like Lieutenant Columbo - act the part of someone who doesn't quite understand the issues by using phrases such as "You're probably one step ahead of me butÉ"
Elicit the blockage -'The Why'- match your own values with the values of another person or another organisation.
'Chunk up' or 'chunk down' the topic Ð a technique called the 'agreement frame' to help loosen up your colleague's intransigent point of view
Build rapport - so vital for any sort of negotiation.
Listen carefully with genuine sincerity. Avoid using presumptive phrases like "You shouldn't worry about that".
Learn to spot unvoiced emotions.
Give the other person 'space' and actively listen.
Learn how and how not to use eye contact .
Use your own body language and facial expression to advantage.
Know the right time and place.
Learn to summarise with precision.
By coaching your team to utilise a range of unblocking techniques such as these, you will place yourself in a strong position to bring your uncooperative colleague on side.

For more information please contact: Robin.Johnson@o-consulting.com
Robin Johnson is a Director of O" consulting

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